Why Asian fans are crazy for us !

Dear Schaedelbasisbruch!

After your phat concert on the 11th of August in Kwan Hoon Stadium in Seoul, Korea, I started following your whole tour. This concert was so fuckin' dirty, you wild cunts. I got so excited when Cobra touched me after I touched her smelly ass!!! I wet my tiny tanga slip through and through. And I can still smell it, whenever I masturbate to your CD. That sound, especially the chorus of EINLAUF, drives me so mad, out of my mind. When I'm listening to it on my walkman in the tube, I have to get off and visit a toilet so I can touch my asshole. Then I think of you cunts, imagining you four bitches having sex together, and I come! Rock it - harder - wider - wilder - more!

Your loving fan

The Fans

There are all kinds of metal fans, from the 50-year old math teacher to the twelve-year old schoolboy, from the North Korean student to the Egyptian factory laborer, from the Soviet nationalist to the German antifascist. Love for the music is the thing that holds together trashmetal fans of every nationality, age, sex, ethnic origin, social background, and political conviction. You are not born a trashmetal fan, you become one. Most fans discover this uncommonly harsh music in the age between ten and thirteen. Sometimes their older brother or sister is already a trashmetal fan, or their close friend gives them a compilation tape of favorite metal songs. Whatever the circumstances, each and every fan describes their first contact with metal as a significant experience, like awakening from a deep sleep.